Thursday, September 15, 2005
THE NEW FANTASTIC FOUR.
The second issue of our bootleg review heralds the arrival of THE NEW FANTASTIC FOUR!
Here is another gem produced by our nutty bootleggers in China who do not possess the slightest inkling of the Marvel characters.
CHINA MAN 1: What do you do for a living?
CHINA MAN WHO WORKS IN A BOOTLEG FACTORY: I sit there all there putting together Fantastic Fours and Gundams.
CHINA MAN 1: What are they?
CHINA MAN WHO WORKS IN A BOOTLEG FACTORY: Dildos?
Now I swear that this fellow here is supposed to be Reed Richards, even though he does not really look that elastic.
You really have to give some credit to those loony bastards over in there China for coming up with the spanking idea of outfitting the ang-moh Fantastic Four characters with these awesome Oriental China man muhfuh weapons. JUST LOOK AT THOSE CRAZY GLEAMING SWORDS AND DAGGERS!
Trust me, I wouldn't call my little ninja dagger the 'little red ninja dagger' is it's as huge as my damn arm!
Yes, this really is Susan Storm the Invisible Woman.
Would you look at the dreadful sculpting and the horrific paintjob? This is one ugly whore!
I can't make out what the damn weapons are except for the throwing stars, they look like pointed discuses!
And what the fuck is that golden claw-like shit? Mega Robot Wolverine(China Logan Man)?
I love THE NEW FANTASTIC FOUR!
